Age changes it all...

Today an instructor in one of my classes read a very personal essay to us. It was a narrative written in the first person. He wrote is exceptionally well but that wasn't shocking. He has a PhD in English and writing like that must come easy to him or does it?

Writing about such a personal matter can be hard for even one with a PhD. He shared with the entire class a time of his life that was very delicate, a time that was personal; this story helped us understand him better. But, the outcome could have been different. His narrative didn't share a positive side of him. Now, some might have been able to read in between and understand that he has changed a lot as a person; others might perceive him as an inconsiderate jerk who made stupid decisions as a young adult. In my opinion, he has seen so much in life and his life has truly been a journey. He has changed dramatically over the years and today he is a genuinely good human being.

Why am I ranting about a professor? Because today I learned that people change over the years. As we grow and experience life, we become different people. I remember the person I was when I was 16, 20, even 22 but today I am almost 25 and a total different person. He is too and I thank him for teaching me this lesson today, along with many others.

Forward... Not backwards....

The last couple of days have been especially hard for me because I lost a big part of me. I lost my car. I understand that its just a mere car but honestly, my car was one of my accomplishments throughout the years. It was something that I could have said was my "own." I gave my car away because I simply couldn't afford it anymore. Payments were too high and being unemployed left me helpless.

I cried about it. Handing over the keys was especially hard. But, I told myself that it would be OK.

Then today I learned a bigger lesson. I was watching T.V, one of mom's Indian dramas- "Betaab Dil Ki Tamana and even though the story line was nothing close to mine, something that was said made me realize the reality of life. One of the characters said, "You aren't going back in life, you're actually going forward. Even though you are returning to your older lifestyle, you're still going forward because you are pursing your true happiness." It just happened to be love that he was talking about. 

So, I figured, although, I am going back to one of the older cars that I drove when I was 18, I am still moving forward in life. I could have easily quit school, gotten a full time job but my choice to be in school to have a better future is more important. Yes, I will making a few sacrifices along the way, but those are only temporary. After I am done with school, I will have more choices.

Money isn't everything but independence is. The fact that I can choose my lifestyle and be able to provide for my family is important to me. I have seen my mom struggle all her life and now I am slowly seeing my father, who hasn't always been in the picture, struggle and I don't want to be that person. I want to be able to live life comfortably. I want to be able to give them the lives they deserve. The simple pleasures in life is all I want to give them, especially my mother.

I realized today that life sometimes puts us in situations that might seem like we are back tracking but in actuality we are moving forward. Moving forward towards dreams... one step closer one day at a time.

Random Facts About Romi

1. I dislike reality shows.

2. I was bit by a centipede at the age of 5 and never went to a hospital. My leg had turned blue green.

3. I enjoy writing narratives.

4. Even though I hate to admit it, I am very competitive when it comes to school.

5. I day dream a lot.

6. Small acts of kindness make me smile.

7. I love to smile.

8. I love receiving flowers & thoughtful presents (even if its just a leaf-- it has to be thoughtful)

9. I sometimes cry when I pray--even when I'm happy.

10. I believe in miracles. 

11. I can't get from point A to B without directions. Ever. 

12. My parking skills are equal to that of a 10 year old. 

13. I love shopping for others but get bored very quickly when shopping for myself. 

14. Chocolate is gods best creation.

15. I am usually categorized as a "push over"-- I'm working on it. 

16. I have no trouble sharing my life with others. I think that if at least one person can learn from my mistakes, then my mistakes were well worth it. 

17. I love watching commercials-- there are some very clever and creative people behind those ads!

18. I have never smoke a cigarette. 

19. I think I am clinically depressed and in denial. 

20. I like attention from my loved ones. (this might be a psychological issue)
21. I like to make plans and when things don't go as planned, I usually get frustrated. 
22. I over analyze everything. Yes, everything. 

Honeymoon Phase

Relationships start off so well. Two people, totally in love. All mushy and lovey dovey. Always looking to steal a kiss or just a glimpse of their dearly beloved. Just a look from them flaps butterflies in your stomach uncontrollably. Holding hands, pecking cheeks ... laying down together... every moment spent together is heavenly...

Then slowly things fade away. The kisses slowly fade. The hugs disappear. The pecks dissipate. And the stomach looses the butterflies. Fights begin. Quarrels become a norm. The I love you's diminish and nothing is ever the same.  Why does that happen? Why can't relationships stay in the "honeymoon" phase forever.

My goal is to keep my relationship with him in the "honeymoon" phase until the end. Whenever that might be. I will try my best to make each day as if it were the first day. Yes, it will be difficult, but I will try to keep the spark inside us alive forever. And if one day I feel that the spark is no longer either; either with him or me, I will leaver. Forever.

Sorry

The word sorry doesn't always come through as a sincere apology because it's so over used. It has become an automatic response for many. "Sorry"

Even though many don't value the word anymore, it still has much power if said with sincerity.

Many times we forget that our behavior, either deliberate or not, can hurt someone. Sometimes just apologizing with sincerity and whole heartedly makes a world of difference.

I just wish that we could redeem the integrity of the word sorry. And use it to help rather then infuriate.

Rockin Pumpkin Muffin

These muffins are really good! And they are really good for you too! So, don't feel guilty- go ahead have one! The recipe will make 36! They freeze extremely well. Just pop em in the microwave at 20-30 seconds for each and you have a quick breakfast!

Ingredients:
1 1/2 cups raisins
4 3/4 cups whole wheat flour
3 1/2 cups raw sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1 1/2 teaspoons nutmeg
1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cloves
6 eggs
1 (29 ounce) can pumpkin
1 ripe banana smashed
1 cup unsweetened applesauce
1 cup chopped walnuts (optional)



Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 C). Grease three 12 cup muffin pans, or line with paper muffin liners. Soak raisins in hot water for ten minutes to plump, then drain. In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, salt, nutmeg, cinnamon, and ground cloves. In a separate bowl, mix the eggs, pumpkin, and applesauce, until smooth. Add this mixture to the dry ingredients and stir thoroughly to make a smooth batter. Stir the raisins and walnuts into the batter. Spoon batter 3/4 of the way into the prepared muffin cups. Bake for 30 to 35 minutes in the preheated oven, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean.

Amount Per Serving  Calories: 207 | Total Fat: 3.3g | Cholesterol: 35mg

**Variations: you can add flax seeds/oat bran or any other seeds if you please to make it even more healthier. I made them again 2/6/2010 and I substituted pureed carrots and 2 extra ripe bananas in place of the pumpkin puree. They were awesome! I sprinkled granola and crushed almonds on top. YUMMY is all I can say!!!